Monday, August 1, 2016

Monkey Balancing



Seems Rajdeep Sardesai was called upon to comment upon what he refers to as the “Arnab-Barkha war”. RS must have realised this would mean “Monkey Balancing” between two former colleagues. So he wisely chooses not to speak. He writes “Why I will not speak on the Arnab-Barkha 'war'”. Though it fails my intelligence why he should even write the article if he did not want to speak about it. This is quite similar to Barkha saying “I don’t give a toss” about what Arnab says but keeps on ranting. Here’s part of what RS wrote in his inconsolable grief on having to MB between his two friends:


If you talk of the pain of two wasted generations of Kashmiri youth living under a draconian law like AFSPA, then you are an anti national, pseudo liberal. If you scream about the agony of Kashmiri Pandits becoming refugees in their own country, then you are a 'nationalist' and a patriot. If you speak of both tragedies, then you are, as some of us are lampooned, a 'monkey balancer'. If you report on the travails of our soldiers facing stones in Kashmir and land mines in Naxal areas, you are a desh bhakt and nationalist; if you expose the human right violations in the valley or tribal India, you are anti national. If you report on both, you are, well, considered a 'monkey balancer'…. Well, here is my take: journalism is actually often about being a 'monkey balancer', of diligently seeking the truth….” 



Deah Oh Dear! After reading the above I had to scratch my head. Despite coining the title “Monkey Balancer” for him I now realise I did not explain the concept properly to RS at all. I guess I'm a bad teacher. Because RS claims monkey balancing is the right approach to journalism and seeking the truth in his article. Alarming!



I should have explained to RS that “Balanced Reporting” and “Monkey Balancing” are two different things. When you FAIRLY report two sides of a coin on the same issue or event or incident one could call it balanced reporting. But when you try to connect and equate two unrelated issues, events or incidents to cover up for one, I call it “Monkey Balancing”. For instance, he refers to KPs and AFSPA. If you were to fairly report the situation on both in a given context that would be considered balanced. Also, if you want to report tribal conditions and travails of our jawans in Naxal areas then both have to be in a given context. One cannot report either as a stand alone issue and claim balanced reporting. So let me make a second attempt at educating Rajdeep on what constitutes Monkey Balancing and I hope I succeed this time.



First, let’s start with some others. None better than the legal-saint of wrong causes, the one called Indira Jaising, who is also accused of FCRA violations in her NGO:


Get it? There is a petition in SC against triple talaaq but the woman talks nonsense and equates it with discriminatory practices in other religions including Hindu law. Is there a petition against any Hindu law? NO! On the contrary, the SC is on record stating govts have only reformed Hindu laws. And the beauty? Jaising is actually defending triple talaaq in the SC. It’s not just monkey balancing but brazen hypocrisy and lying in public. Next, let’s take up “Wheeler-Dealer” royale of Luyens:


Congress had released some 25 Pak terrorists secretly. When the party was slammed Shekhar Gupta equates it with the release of a terrorist during the Kandahar hostage crisis. Is there any equivalence? Azhar Masood was released during the Kandahar situation to save Indian lives under great pressure from the families and, yes, the media too. So this bogus equation by SG is to defend his darling Congress in their inexplicable decision which has no reason whatsoever. Okay, so who should I go to next? Ummm… why not Rajdeep’s very own?


The great Indian economist states economy is tanking and people are yelling Malda and Jallikattu. Really? So because the economy is supposedly bad we should not talk about other things? Especially Malda? Let’s see, we shouldn’t talk about Malda because it involves Muslim violence. And she lies too. Malda never made any noise in the media; they mostly blacked it out. What if it were to be about Hindus? Both Rajdeep and Sagarika would be jumping up and down like kids and screaming their lungs out – economy tanking or not. It is like, there are severe floods in Assam but PM is on a tour to Africa. This is stupid monkey balancing and not even an intelligent one. But hold on! Sagarika is not the type to disappoint us. Let’s pick on her very good friend whom she slyly defends:


Now, these were concocted allegations against some Saheb (A reference to Narendra Modi, I guess) and there was trash galore in the media somehow trying to taint him. So what does C5M do? She washes the sins of her good friend Tarun Tejpal (accused of rape) with a false equation. Even otherwise, Saheb was not even alleged to have been in any rape incident or anything. So you see, how cleverly this monkey thing works Rajdeep? Now, let’s go to the Master himself – Rajdeep, the Chief Monkey Balancer of Indian media:


I really laughed when I first saw this. TheJaggi was talking about how Islam itself has to cure Islamic militancy but Rajdeep jumps in with militant Hindutva. He stuns even TheJaggi. First, there is no such thing as militant Hindutva. It’s as much a nonsensical creation of Hindu-hater Rajdeep as was “Saffron terror” by his Congi bosses. Whereas, Islamic terror is universal. This is why Rajdeep is a MONKEY BALANCER of the worst kind. This has nothing to do with BALANCED REPORTING. Best part of the above image is – TheJaggi asks why did Hindutva come into this, and the guy below answers “Because you’re talking to Rajdeep”. That’s how much Rajdeep is identified with hating Hindus. I like Rajdeep, so let’s roll some more…


Damn! Somehow because some cleric called for a beheading our monkey balancer has to bring in some Hindu Mahasabha leader. Well, he would have a point if the acts were equal. The Muslim calls for BEHEADING and Rajdeep wants it to be equated to some hate speech by a Hindu leader. Where is the equivalence? Are the crimes similar? No! Even if they were, why should the two be equated without the context of the crime? I was about to close class but I heard Rajdeep begging for one more chapter. Here you go:


That one is really the best in this list. Chief Monkey Balancer equates RSS relief work with Mother Teresa’s work with the poor. MT’s work with the poor is in reality a lot of myth. She just helped the poor and sick die as Christians. Secondly, as my narration in the image says – Did RSS seek to convert people they save? The Mother Teresa types and other Christian relief works do it primarily to seek more goats to convert. There is no equivalence. This is Monkey Balancing of the WORST kind by Rajdeep that is intended to belittle the Hindu organisation that has saved many lives over the years without any selfish motives. The opposite is not true for Jesus-Salesmen.



In case Rajdeep still doesn’t get it, I derived Monkey Balancing from the old Panchatantra story. In the story two cats find a Roti and fight over it. Monkey comes along and promises equal share for both but keeps dividing the Roti unequally and keeps eating up the excess portion from each. In the end there is no Roti left. The cats are fooled.  The Monkey is a clever cheat. That’s why Rajdeep “don’t pride yourself in monkey balancing”, it is the attribute of a cheat. That’s why you got that title.


49 comments :

  1. Wah Wah Pranams to you Ravinar. Excellent Monday morning class ...

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  2. Wah Wah Pranams to you Ravinar. Excellent Monday morning class ...

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  3. Actually Street thug understands better in morning shift.

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  4. Actually Street thug understands better in morning shift.

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  5. you keep hitting these unethical journos where it hurt most. you have bared open their sustained concealed bias with your logical explanation. just wondering why the likes of you are not in the MSM and why most of that space is occupied by these hypocritical thugs disguised as journalist.
    They are actually being slain by the same sword, they used to be identified earlier with i.e. TRP. The loss of credibility is now being compounded by loss of money as well. And that , i think, is the main reason, they are drawing blood at their own fraternity. what a miserable fall thay have brought upon themselves...

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  6. Pucca extra Old Monk bottle will be consumed in Gin 'n Rum nivas today!

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  7. Smart ,educated people who have got the capability to articulate deceive educated english public by publishing incomparable polarities. Only a discerning ,perceptive mind who has got clarity in thinking can see and educate the educated the Another standing ovation for MC.Excellent learning .It is time we own the MC in us and start discerning and articulate .

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    1. Absolutely Shiv Sundaresan! These pseudos deceive the 'English public' who are not 'educated' as you put it, but 'uneducated' because of 'English' and have lost the ability to think clearly and discern! Bane of Macaulayism! Many of my 'city-bred', 'english-speaking', 'scotch-sipping' drawing-room-convo experts, still think so highly about these jargon-churners in the Media!

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    2. Even today good English is the benchmark for wisdom in our MSM & society atlarge.Many professions have attained nobility by virtue of english speech.( Pressitution, Fashion design, Ad agencies,IT MBA(CEOs Only),Social activism,NGOs etc).Their logical acumen is dismally poor.But if we see cutting edge technologies like the Atomic Energy commission or ISRO, we see genuinely wise people who are not good english speakers(They generally employ english speakers as spokespersons). Even the best schools in the country can only guarantee spoken english at best and nothing more. The art of thinking is alien to our education system.In every MNC companies today, the english speakers dominate the system. The true performers are never seen in the pic. The english speaking MBSs have all the admin powers to remote control the performers and may often ruin their career as well. All the pink slips and layoffs that we hear in startups and MNCs today are of the non english speaking performers who cannot convince the english speaking managements by their performance.

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  8. A simple question...
    How would you attain "Monkey Balancing" with Rajdip? If he were to stand on a tarazu (big enough to hold him), what or who would be on the other side to achieve a "monkey" balance?

    http://www.bajiroo.com/2013/08/23-photos-of-funny-balancing/funny-monkey-balancing/

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    1. दो कौड़ी!
      यही मूल्य/लायकी है उसकी।

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    2. दो कौड़ी!
      यही मूल्य/लायकी है उसकी।

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  9. मर्मान्तक!
    खल्लास खाजपीप का बैक्टीरियम!

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  10. मर्मान्तक!
    खल्लास खाजपीप का बैक्टीरियम!

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  11. This is excellent. Hope Rajdeep has learnt true meaning of monkey balancing 😁

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  12. Even though you are on a crusade against dishonest and crooked journalists (no second thoughts as I am with you in this crusade) my hope in this government is slowly fading as I don't find any concrete action on the ground against media houses like NDTV. Hope the government wakes up before it is too late

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  13. Wow, wow! A fantastic analysis of what Rajdeep and his ilk stand for. When will we ever see the backs of Barkha, Rajdeep, C5M, etc from the Indian journalistic scene?

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  14. You can write pages after pages about Indian presstitutes NDTV, The Hindu or about evil politicians Sonia or Mamta or even Obama or Merkel. It will not help. These are just stooges.

    Real enemy is Islam. It's soldiers muslims have crossed 20% in Indian population. There is a huge genocide of Hindus coming up in India. Get ready to take up arms or die at the hands of Muslims.

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  15. Rajdeep Sardesai is adding spin to even a phrase that was coined to expose his misdeeds. There is absolutely no hope with these spinsters. Journalism will remain in danger till these people stay there.

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    1. he doesn't even present himself correctly on Camera. Tries to talk fast and uses so much stress on words that his saliva comes out often and shows off as if he is the brilliant Guy.

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  16. What is wrong if Kashmiris do not want to get looted by Indian business communities? Will any Mr. India please answer my question?

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    1. Dear Moron Vivek,

      You have been spamming this site nonstop with your STUPID question over the past few days. I have let it pass by merely ignoring it. Since you are so desperate for an answer and repeat the stupid question, that too on a non-related post let me give you a clear answer.

      Here it is MORON: Whether its Kashmiris, you or your family or whichever stone you crawled under from - nobody wants to be looted by anyone - Indian businessmen, govt or even a hawker. Its because your question is dumb that nobody bothered to respond.

      Now if you want to fight for Kashmiri Azaadi because of your stupid, illogical argument you go take up the cause and fight. Maybe fill the shoes of Burhan Wani.

      Now get out of here and dont spam this site again. I hope this is absolutely clear to you...

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    2. Mr. Vivek, your problem is that you consider kashmir separate from india. i.e. the problem.

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  17. Wah Wah kya baat hai. RS stands fully exposed. Thanks MC for exposing the skulduggery of these traitors.

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  18. Another thumping lesson from Mr. Ravinar to Presstitutes like Rajdeep Sardesai. But these pseudo-journos have such thick skin even rhinos would be proud to have one like theirs. It's like water off a duck's back. Nothing will change the mindset of these media-brokers.

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  19. While balancing the scale the monkey deducts his cut to imbalance the scales again and again, till everything is exhausted and nothing is left for either side. Barakha will not allow him the cut and Arnab may carpet boob the old monk.

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  20. "Art of dissecting alive" (chamdi utaarna) has to be learned from you Sir!
    Masterly compilation of facts and presentation. Hats off!

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  21. @Ravinar, Just one correction. It is Azhar Masood not Azhar Mehmood.

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  22. Presstitutes and presshyas are being shielded by monkey balancers. One has more respect even for enemies like Hafiz Saeed than these gutter worms. Our nation's curse is that there are a lot of them and have patrons high up in the Lutyens cesspool. Amazing to hear Arun Shourie bitterly attacking Arnab Goswami. This guy has totally lost it. Sour grapes can really be very sour.

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    1. like Amithab said in a movie. Finnit chahiye in cockroachon ko maarne ke liye.

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  23. “A balanced treatment of an unbalanced phenomenon distorts reality” (Thomas Mann & Norm Ornstein)

    False equivalence in the media — giving equal weight to unsupported or even discredited claims for the sake of appearing impartial — is not unusual. There are many sides to almost every story, but that doesn’t mean they are automatically equal. Giving equal time and weight to a wide range of arguments without regard to their credibility risks creating a “false balance” in the public debate.

    Too much of the media has become increasingly fixated on finding “balance,” even if it means presenting fiction on par with fact.
    The media has a tendency to issue unfiltered “he said, she said” accounts of political issues. The result is that every controversy seems to be reduced to a binary debate between two sides.

    Forcing balance where there is none is not journalistically ethical. It’s not part of the proud and essential tradition of truth telling and evaluation, either. At best, it’s lazy. At worst, it’s an abdication of the media’s responsibility. Rather than uncritically repeating talking points, it's time for the media to exercise editorial judgment. Because if the scale tips in favor of the truth, that’s not imbalanced reporting. That’s journalism.

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  24. I hope somebody, someday will start a media channel that is bang in the center and will be professional. Meanwhile keep exposing these idiots. Excellent work by MC.

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  25. I hope somebody, someday will start a media channel that is bang in the center and will be professional. Meanwhile keep exposing these idiots. Excellent work by MC.

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  26. Great piece...even a 4th standard kid if read your earlier articles could have understood what you mean by monkey balancing. Rajdeep writing about Monkey balancing has precisely done the same in that article.

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  27. Please go to the following change.org link and sign the petition demanding action against anti national media:

    https://www.change.org/p/we-should-stop-pakistani-support-media-in-indian-soil-and-put-charges-against-barkha-dutt?recruiter=435461902&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=share_email_responsive

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  28. You are da boss, dude. I don't even have anything to add - you have stripped Sardesai bare with his own tweets so badly that no additional commentary is needed.

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  29. Eliyahu Ben-Shaul Cohen commonly known as Eli Cohen was a high level spy in Damascus, Syria from 1961 to 1965. The ruling oligarchs, generals, officials and others loved to hobnob with him, vying to get an invite to his lavish parties. Obliging military officers gladly showed him all their defences on the Golan Heights - info which was invaluable to the Israeli army.

    My point is merely that an enemy agent doesn't need to be a shadowy figure moving in the dark sides of the back-alleys. A high profile media glamour personality blatantly in-your-face helping the enemy can do just as well.

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  30. You are good teacher, but you can not teach an old monkey new patriot tricks, when he sniffs his own butt! See Arnab is good student, but bad seeds of Lutyans including queen of presstitutes will never learn, period.

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  31. Oh, gosh! These are googlies one after another!!

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  32. Come 2019 and these ageing monkey balancers will become totally irrelevant. Who will listen to them or read them? Remember those leftist ideologues of yore? They wrote only and only for their fellow ideologues in the gibberish only they could understand.That is what will happen to these men and women.

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  33. Monkey balancing may be act of cheat. But Monkeys are not traitors and by comparing them to street thug RS and his NDTV friends one should not insult or offend the simians.

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  34. I was going to say the street thug lacks integrity, but will rephrase that: his ilk think that because they hit low, they actually have an upper hand. They don't see it as a lack of something, they see it as a skill.

    Hence this monkey cannot be taught. But, you can make us laugh by making the monkey do tricks. And dancing to your tunes ��. Awesome Ravinar, thanks.

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  35. Excellent Ravinar... And the end "it is the attribute of a cheat. That’s why you got that title" was like the last nail.. superb..

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  36. here is an idea for a TV show (may be tie up with existing channel like Sudarshan tv)

    1 HR Prime Time English News Debate
    Ravinar is the main lead
    Bring in other like minded talented folks from twitter to add some humor and talent
    Bring in other like minded like anupam kher, vivek agnihotri, ashok pandit, raveen tandon to add some glamor with brains

    Most imp run it same time as Barkha's show 8PM

    Raise funds for the show, i'm sure funding wont be a problem.. the only question is can ravinar dream big take it to next leve?

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  37. Ravi, you have frightened MBRS (Monkey balancing Rajdeep Sardesai) to the extent that he is now less in to presstitutionalism and more in to attending college/school seminars. Great job of exposing these liars naked and we always support you for this. I foresee some more presstitutes considering retirement.

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  38. Do these journos about who you write read your blog? If they do they really have to do a soul search or chullu bhar pani me doob marna chahiye.

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  39. If they are even slightly honest in Monkey Balancing and not rank hypocrites, we might even forgive them. When did Rajdeep or his ilk even tried MB and said that they held Congress CMs responsible when ever there was racial riots in Gujarat in the past? Or compared Congress CMs' try to obtain help from neighboring states? Or compared number of Hindus killed by the police bullets during past riots? When did he say any soothing words for the family members of soldiers killed by the terrorists?

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