Thursday, November 8, 2012

The Obaminables



And so the US election has come to pass and Barack Obama has been re-elected for another term. As they often like to report in Indian elections; no violence or booth capturing was reported and nobody died. The thrill in our Indian media over the elections and particularly the victory of Obama was predictable. Then everyone had specialists, of course, to answer the eternal question “What does it mean for India”?

I mentioned in my previous post that I got most of my education from the Asterix comics. Our MSM will tell you how multi-cultural and diverse the US population is and how their society is changing. But actually Indians, we are more like the Gauls. Every free minute we have, we love to have a good fight. We fight over every silly thing till we knock the senses out of each other and then, like the Gauls, we get together and have a great party and meal after every big fight. There’s a small difference though, the Gauls had the good sense to tie up Cacofonix. We don’t have any such luck with our very own Cacofonix. There are some major differences. No matter how much the Gauls fought each other the moment they saw the Romans they were all united. They had one leader, one voice and the willingness to defend their little village at any and all costs. Their Druid had the magic potion, our druid (MMS) is still searching for a magic wand. And we have a Roman amongst us. But the folks in our MSM constantly want us to wonder why we can’t be like the Americans instead of the Gauls. (By the way, some Romans will be playing Cricket in our land soon). Folks in our MSM even love our enemies and frequently host them on their channels. So what does Obama’s victory mean for India? I can educate you… but hey, let’s hear from the experts.

This guy who goes by the title of Ashish Dikshit sends out a tweet thanking America. He’s an assistant editor in IBN Lokmat. Don’t laugh, he seriously is. I guess he was thanking America in the hope that they will save India from Hindu extremists. Well, he was the one who tweeted that Hindu extremists were behind the last Pune blasts (I say last because there has been a series and who knows..). And when confronted with his stupidity the man tweeted the Pune case is still sub-juicy. I mean, it’s now in the courts or something but he figured out before the police or the investigators that it was Hindu extremists. Wonder how he got the juice then. For Marathi viewers of TV this is the guy and his channel that brings the most intelligence to their homes.

What about the acclaimed author Ashutosh? Well, if not for this guy you wouldn’t understand the significance of Americans rejecting the Roman. Mitt ‘Romany’ that is! Asterix was right; everybody seems to hate the Romans. Even Americans! And as a keen observer of American society he delivers the profound observation that they are “reinventing” themselves. So like Surf or Vim you can expect to see a “New, Improved America”. Now you wait and watch how the world is washed with this new “reinvented” stuff. There’s hope.

Michelle Obama, the lovely first lady, stuck to CNN-IBN all night and watched the results and analysis. She knew her hubby would win but not why. So she was glued to Rajdeep’s deep analysis of the results and then tweeted: ‘When it comes to political analysis, Rajdeep Sardesai is Numero Uno’. I totally agree. A regular reader of this blog was more honest. LakshmishaKS tweeted: “@sardesairajdeep Thank you for your analysis and providing such minute details of the US elections, was really helpful for my life”. There, you see, Rajdeep has changed the lives of many with his deep analysis. I guess he'll miss the sarcasm and pat himself on the back.Then you did have the monk’s profound wisdom to our political parties to be more “inclusive”. The rate at which this term is being abused we might soon have a ‘Ministry of Inclusive’. Ah well, if the Numero Uno can dish out such wisdom can the Numero Unee be far behind?

So our very own Cacofonix, also the greatest Social Genius since Al Gore invented the Internet, first suggests that Whites are not enough (read Hindus are not enough) and it’s important to reach out to minorities. A little later the journalistic-bimbo found Indians in the US are fulminating against the ‘minority politics’ of Obama. She asks if Indians aren’t a minority in the US and so why they complain. You know, it’s hard to crack into certain skulls that involving minorities and ‘minority politics’ are two different things. Besides, she doesn’t get into her thick skull that the Indian minority is not the same as ‘THE minority’. The Indians who may be complaining about ‘minority politics’ are probably talking of ‘illegal Bangladeshis’ in America or that minority which is permanently in the ‘victimhood’ mode. I don’t care really as long as Obama finally amends the US Constitution to make ‘female orgasm’ a Fundamental Right.

It’s not over until the fat lady sings they say. I don’t want to go into what that means but I only know that any democratic, liberal, inclusive, inspiring and instructive exercise in the US has important lessons for India. Oh.. and it’s not so much who won, like Ravi Shastri would say “Democracy is the clear winner’. Barkha Dutt echoes Ashutosh on changing societies, changing elections and how the cynical Indian must learn to vote. So please, all of you cynics, now that you’ve seen Obama win with inclusiveness, dynamics of society and understood the instructive lessons from the US, please do vote. Okay? These tweets and the analysis one saw on TV are just personal opinions and harmless really. But it does show up one thing for sure. It once again confirms the fact that our media morons have as short a memory as they accuse the general public of. Five years ago, these very pundits explained how Mayawati had found a magic formula in “social engineering”. How she won the elections by getting together Dalits, Muslims, Jains, Sikhs, Hindus, Yadavs, Brahmins, Kurmis.. In short, she put together a ‘Rahul Gandhi’ in each constituency to win the UP elections of 2007. Five years later she is cooling her specially flown heels somewhere. The media morons also ignore the US history. In the past 50 years there are only four presidents who have not been re-elected. Let’s estimate the reason behind each of them.

JFK’s successor Lyndon Johnson didn’t get re-elected in 1968 because he chose not to run again. The Vietnam war had drained him. Gerald Ford didn’t get re-elected in 1976 because his predecessor, Richard Nixon, had left the cross of Watergate hanging around the neck of the Republican presidency. (Ford was never directly elected President he took over from Nixon as he was VP). Jimmy Carter didn’t get re-elected in 1980 because of the terrible events of Iran. 60 Americans were held hostage in the US embassy in Iran for 444 days and Carter had a botched rescue attempt to boot. It is unlikely Americans would forgive such a thing. We do, with all the Indian hostages that Somali pirates take. The hostages were released on the day the next president, Ronald Reagan, took oath. George Bush Sr. didn’t get re-elected in 1992. This was after 12 consecutive years of Republicans. It’s not very hard to understand wanting change, especially with the flamboyant Bill Clinton as candidate, whose oratory skills, (oratory that our media gushes over) are far superior to Obama’s. Even the much lampooned George Bush, who won a controversial election in 2000, won his re-election with a thumping majority in 2004. So two Democrats and two Republicans were never re-elected. What’s this big deal about Obama?

Our so-called experts forget one thing. Even Americans strongly vote on religious lines. Mitt Romney is a Mormon. He is not of the Christian/Catholic denomination that George Bush was. So whether Whites, Blacks, Hispanics or “minorities” that still remains an important factor. So, all this talk of changing society or “inclusiveness” is not something that has suddenly happened in this particular election. This is the load of BS which is being passed on. The second thing is, unless something terribly bad happens, as with Jimmy Carter, most US presidents do get a second term and nothing dramatically unusual in Obama’s case too.

Now, as far as this bunch of media morons, whose ever-loving admiration of democracy and “inclusiveness” is overflowing, they really need to worry if they are doing the jobs they are meant to do instead of orgasming over the US elections. Closer home, a petition has been filed by one Prabhat Pandey in UP (see TOI report). His lament is that he wasn’t allowed to file his nomination to contest Dimple Yadav. Now this Dimple is the wife of UP CM Akhilesh Yadav. She won the Kannauj election for a seat in the Lok Sabha. Uncontested! Congress, BJP, BSP and other parties colluded to let her win the election. That, is the biggest crime in democracy. None of these democracy-loving celebs who lecture the world on democratic values held a single debate or program to condemn the political parties who allowed this crime to pass. There was neither a protest nor any kind of discussion on any TV channel in what should be seen as a malpractice in a democracy to allow candidate go uncontested. In a similar situation in the US, Michael Moore, documentary film maker and activist, put up a plant ‘Ficus’ to challenge an uncontested candidate. (See all 3 parts of the film on Youtube). His sarcastic take says it all.

So all this blabbering by our media celebs has nothing to with India or even democracy. It’s nothing more than what they perceive is their own liberal lifestyle. In fact, they stand for the worst form of dictatorship and cronyism one will ever find in the democratic world. The only thing they value is their own freedom and liberty to utter nonsense day in and day out. For the moment they are starring in “The Obaminables”, few days or months later they will once again “evolve” the Gandhi. 

37 comments:

  1. The problem here with these self claimed genius and society maker is that they have their hidden agenda (not hidden to public any more) to promote their marcsist and very Gandhis.

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  2. Wonderful reading! Bull's eye!!

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  3. Simply superb Ravinar.
    Your post titles are just too good.

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  4. Ha Ha Ha, you are correct. NDTV Hindi (the mouthpiece) called one so-called Dalit expert to discuss so-s-el engineering in the USA. Deepak Chourasia,the editor of ABP news went on the US tour where seemingly he could interview two persons - a Sikh Taxi driver who was more concentrating on his driving rather than answering, the other was a fun loving white lady who was busy in laughing and screeming. Finally, Justice Arnab in his judgement said that Pakistan will be the loser in any case, he has reserved his judgement on Gadkari (appeal from Jethmalani and Diggi) for the next day.

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  5. Why Dikshit was thanking American people to re-elect Obama is over my understanding. Is he & his channel getting some kind of funds from Obama?

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  6. For all thier bimbo analysis about inclusiveness... rural america voted for Romney 58% and urban america 62% for obama.. even though the media and congis are mastrubating on obama win, guess who enjoys urban support in india?

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  7. Female orgasm a fundamental right...LOL..super column loved it

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  8. The US court while throwing out the 100m$ defamation law suit filed by the Overseas Congress specifically said "Here we have classic case of a Political Party in India trying to use it's long arm via INOC to silence it's critics in US. We in US have don't believe in the use of judiciary to silence political opponents". Can India MSM take this up and discuss it on some TV show.

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  9. Amidst all this talk of "inclusiveness and changing demographics" (in American society) playing a 'crucial' role in Obama's victory, I wouldn't be surprised if these same media morons ended up labeling American society as 'racist', had Mitt Romney won. I mean, if Romney had won, we would've seen plenty of Romney bashing ("Romney-phobia"), especially by Barkha, Sagarika, etc.

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  10. Raviji I just pray that i get your analysing and writing skills in my next birth. Spot on article loved reading it to the hilt.

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  11. Awesome Post. Thanks Ravinar. Malayalam TV Channels was running hour long shows on What's Obama re-election means to India. Some good views , but whole stuff sounded comic rather than anything serious. As for the media morons, i was somehow expecting this - they 'look up' to US media and copy stuff. No wonder in copying the same analysis too. the white vs non-white voting blocks 'sounds' like perfect match for social analysis for 'social genius' rt? I mn a simple reader like me can see the same match - may be i should try for CNN IBN editor post :)

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  12. Yesterday proved how out of synch MSM is from the Indian mood.

    Obama winning was not hot news. It did deserve some prominence, not hysteria.

    Real news would have been Romney winning.

    We have seen 4 years of Obama to know how it effects us, if at all. So what earth shattering and so hugely India centric moves does one expect him to make now that we don't expect?

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  13. Hi Ravi,

    You are monotonously superb. Tired of searching for adjectives for your articles.

    Sincerely
    Anil Kohli

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  14. Nice analysis !
    As Jon Stewart said 'Romney has won the confederacy' !!! it was just a matter of 2 or 3 states and a 2% diff in popular vote that swung it for Obama ! as far as race relations and inclusivity, even the USA has a looooong way to go !

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  15. A super post. I do not know how many anchors have deleted their gyan tweets after reading this post.

    The overdose of US Election coverage definitely deserved a hard slap on their bottoms!

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  16. अच्‍छा दि‍या है भि‍गो-भि‍गो के.
    ये लोग आपके ख़ि‍लाफ़ मि‍लके कुछ एक्‍शन-वैक्‍शन क्‍यों नहीं लेते :)

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  17. Our MSM deserves some credit for standing against the interests of the poor people, promote celebrity cult, speed the process of westrenization and others.

    Without their India would not have progressed, and Mr.Ravi you should for once appreciate their good work.

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  18. U cud have reminded barkha that more people voted in India's last election than in USA this year. So her cribbing about cynical Indians who donot vote is useless. She shud check her facts before commenting.

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  19. My two cents on why Obama won: Had there been a charismatic conservative running against Obama, he/she would have won. The problem with Mitt Romney was that he was perceived as flip flopper, fake conservative, and someone who will always side with his rich friends. Americans are as impatient as any race in this world when it comes to solving their problem. Obama tried his best to make the economy running but couldn't show good results. Americans knew Obama is good person who thinks about middle class but with 23 millions people who are underemployed or unemployed their patient was running out. But somehow and very cleverly the smart people in Obama's campaign team made this election into the perception about Mitt Romney's character, about women's equal pay, about abortion, about immigration, about Auto bailout and about Osama Bin Laden. Mitt Romney also didn't help himself when the new video came out about his 47 percent Americans who don't want to work but want to get paid by the government. Paul Ryan, the Republican VP, attacked the stimulus bill passed by Obama but when his letter, requesting the federal government to send some of the stimulus money to his home state Wisconsin, was leaked he was made to look super stupid. So you see our media have some (evil) agenda. You remember when God's particle was discovered how Sagarika Ghosh used that to bash us Hindus? This is what Indian media is about.

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  20. Great piece! Loved reading it, as always! Please keep the wonderful writing going, Mr Ravinar.

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  21. Obama just cut down the outsourcing in USA. Was it in favor of India??

    Moreover, the media crooks never highlighted the fact that there(in US) there is still the Ballot paper system of voting and not EVM..
    (I guess India is technically far more advanced than America... :D )

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  22. Timely & Perfect. Prolific You. Cheers & Best.

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  23. >>Moreover, the media crooks never highlighted the fact that there(in US) there is still the Ballot paper system of voting and not EVM..>>

    This is not true...I voted in a EVM

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  24. Great analysis...

    Here is some news for this scum PAID MEDIA. Lets see if they will cover it.

    WOW! Another land allocated to dynasty by their party CM. Well! No coverage by PAID MEDIA


    India Today reports another huge land scam by Gandhis

    http://indiatoday.intoday.in/video/maharashtra-government-bend-rules-to-favour-gandhis-trust-rahul-gandhi-sonia-gandhi/1/228265.html?utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=twitterfeed

    Huge prime land in BANDRA (Mumbai) that was first allocated to SC/ST hostel was cancelled and allotted to the family trust.

    RTI filed. No response from Maun Mohan Singh office.

    I am sure the scumbags of the PAID media and AK will be quiet on this.


    http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/gandhis-land-grab-mumbai/1/228261.html

    Even as Janata Party president Subramanian Swamy carries on with his tirade against the Gandhis, fresh allegations of land grabbing have surfaced against Congress president Sonia Gandhi and her son Rahul.

    On Thursday, Headlines Today accessed documents that show a prime Mumbai land plot worth Rs.90 crore was given almost free to a trust controlled by the Gandhis -- Associated Journal -- which has been squatting on the prime property for 30 years without developing it as promised.

    The land was given to the trust to set up its office for the National Herald newspaper. However, it failed to start any activity even 30 years after the land was given. It leads to obvious questions being asked if Gandhis' trust has been hoarding prime land in Mumbai.

    Ironically, the land allotted for the trust was originally meant for a hostel for poor Dalit students makes it even worse.

    Shiv Sena leader Sanjay Raut accused the Maharashtra government of bending rules to favour the Gandhis. Even the documents show that the state government failed to invoke lease terms against the VIP trust in an alleged case of selective application of law.

    Documents show that the state government acceded to the trust's request to realign plot despite non-compliance and there was no action despite it defaulting on payment of rent. The Maharashtra government was yet to clear the air on why it never forfeited the land despite non-adherence to the lease terms.

    Maharashtra Chief Minister Prithviraj Chavan ducked Headlines Today's direct question on the issue, saying he would react only after getting more information on the matter.

    Earlier this month, Swamy had accused Sonia and Congress's general secretary Rahul Gandhi of committing a fraud of Rs.1,600 crore worth property associated with two newspapers, the National Herald and the Qaumi Awaz.

    Prior to that India Against Corruption (IAC) leader Arvind Kejriwal had accused Sonia's son-in-law Robert Vadra of shady land deals with real estate giant DLF resulting in the profit of several crore rupees to him.

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  25. "In short, she put together a ‘Rahul Gandhi’ in each constituency to win the UP elections of 2007." This was just epic! Rofl!!!

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  26. Simple questions for Morons like RajDeep, Sagarika, Barkha and others

    what are the chances of a Non Christian becoming US President?

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  27. There is nothing for us Indians (or even Americans !) to be jubilant over Mr Obama's victory. It was a typical Indian style election of demogogy winning over reason. Americans have started thinking like Indian voters.There is a clear sign of America's societal energy depleting and that it is fast reducing to be an irresponsible democracy like ours.

    President Obama's victory speech is a corporate version of the standard political speech of every Indian politician (Kattabomman dialogue in Thamizh, to be specific). Well, his mention on the citizens' duties after voting and appreciation of Romeney's spirited campaign are the few left overs of the defunct American values.

    No wonder our MSM genii wield their pedanticness to the gullible in this chaos.

    Just Enjoy The Show!

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  28. Inclusive or divisive, President Obama has a clean track record and by far a President with a sincere and honest image. Can any of the Congress candidates claim same?
    We are the most inclusive country in the world and have more diveristy than any nation in the world. Can a non-Christian ever hope for presidency in US? Why does Obama have to keep fighting charges on his birthplace and religion? Has the Indian media ever questioned the fact that the ruling party is led by a person who is born outside India and practises a religion not accepted by the majority. Will Obama have been given the chance(forget presidency) to lead Democrats even at state-level if he had been a Muslim born in Kenya. So much for lessons from US.
    US needs to take lessons from us not the other way round.Indians are not cynical either the fact the second largest population in the world with such a high level of poverty still remains a democracy shows the inherent optimism in the people

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    1. I agree with your conclusions, but not the reasons. 1. US is extremely diverse, far more so than India. 2. Religion and politics are intricately mixed in India, much more so than in US. 3. Having a foreign national in a position of indirect power itself has resulted in multiplying scams, so not sure thats a great success story for us. IMO, we should not open political parties to non-indian citizens,

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  29. Hey Ravi,

    Every morning I pray: "Dear God...grant me my daily orgasm" & whoosh...the Djinn called Ravinar rubs my hemispheres' lamp like no other! I couldn't care if 'female orgasm becomes a fundamental right' but I am getting mine & I love it! ;-)

    Fabulous as always! As the Gauls would say...Thank you Dramatix! :-)

    The_Rocktor

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  30. Ravi, I feel you must have skipped that flirtatious reference in this incisive and yet dignified analysis woven with your characteristic satire. It smells bad and attracts flies.

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    1. @Srivathsan

      You mean I skipped something or are you suggesting I should have skipped something.. Not clear. What are referring to anyway?

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  31. Ravi, I felt you must have avoided writing the following:

    "I don’t care really as long as Obama finally amends the US Constitution to ... a Fundamental Right"

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    1. @Srivathsan

      Haha! That's alright. That statement is not my own. Its a quote from one of Sagarika's article where she wanted that to be a Constitutional Right. My only addition is asking Obama instead of asking Indian lawmakers.

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  32. Dear Ravi - I stopped watching news channels sometime ago....could'nt stand the shallowness and posturing anymore. I prefer watching comedy channels now whenever I get around to watching something :-) Now ur posts keep me updated on what is happening in MSM. The titling of the posts is very creative! Your posts are incisive and well written...but I wonder how many in the media out there read these posts and introspect. I bet there are not many because they belong to the denomination called 'Morons'. If all the media 'intellectuals' had just cared to look at a map of how America voted and seen the splash of red across it, they would have wondered how Obama won instead of tweeting stupid comments.

    There is always talk about the Neta-Babu-Corporate nexus. We need to add the MSM to this now. I would love to hear more about what happens in channels other than English...is the quality as bad? I also love Asterix and even now keep reading them when I am getting close to 60. Keep writing.

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    1. Me too. Regional TV isnt as bad, but the power of money extends there too - only its not a ongoing campaign but paid projects etc.

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  33. Hahahahahha...awesomeness as usual. Had missed this one...thanks for the twitter link.

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